Dreaming God's Way

So I don't think that I have ever written on my blog twice in the same night... but this is important. This is urgent. I did not realize it, but I let my heart stop dreaming...

My heart has forgotten how to remember and to dream in the right way. The Lord is taking me on an amazing journey and I am afraid that through the busyness of school, college classes, work, and everything in between I have forgotten. It saddens my heart beyond words. I just went back and read what I had posted when I returned from Chuuk and my heart filled with sadness and joy and my eyes filled with tears all at the same time.

The dangerous thing about this is that my heart is missing what is behind... it is yearning for it to return again and that is getting in the way of what the Lord wants for me right now.

These new eyes that the Lord has given me are hard to use. Sometimes I wish I could close them because life would be so much easier to live that way. I wouldn't know the things that I know. I wouldn't be at this place where I am continually being called out of my comfort zone. I wouldn't see America the way that I do and so my bitterness would not be so prone to rising up against my own country.

Yet it are these new eyes that are helping me to see Jesus more clearly... It are these new eyes that are helping me to know more of what it means to follow Him. It are these new eyes that are helping me to see the poor and the needy as people who need Jesus' love and as people who I want to bring it to. It are these new eyes that are helping me to fall more and more in love with Jesus and less and less in love with the things of this world.

It are these new eyes that are showing me what faith truly is.

These new eyes strain ahead even when it is easier to live in the past... They look ahead and press towards the goal that my Lord has laid out for me.

"Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." -Philippians 3:13-14

The Lord has set out my present in just the way that He wants it... may I always remember what He has done for me in the past; may I always remember every piece of the Journey because it reminds me and gives me a deeper perspective of His great love for me... But may I strain toward what is ahead, pressing on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. May I never forget what He has done and where He has taken me. May I never forget how to dream. May I always remember to strain ahead without looking back; to move forward with no hesitation.

May the future unfold beautifully...

It is an empty page to me, but to God it is a book of wonders written out by His own Hand.